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The kissing cheerleaders

Written By: Terry Foster | March 8, 2012

Filed Under: Family, Life

I could tell my friend in Florida was upset. There were long pauses between conversations.

“What’s up,” I asked.

“Nothing,” she said.

I told her I was not stupid and for the next 15 minutes her story unfolded. I will change names to protect people, but her daughter Darla is a member of the high school cheer team. She is a sophomore and has always enjoyed jumping on couches and screaming. She is a cute and dainty child who is now beginning to discover womanhood.

The other night she had a couple of her cheer buddies over for a sleep over. They enjoyed pizza, went through some cheers and watched television. It was a typical girls night filled with laughter and stupid talk about boys and school and how they hated Mr. Dumplings the principal. It was past midnight when mom went upstairs to tell the girls to knock it off and go to sleep.

When she did mom caught two of the girls kissing. Their bottoms were on but their tops were off.  They stopped and turned red and said they were just playing around.

Later the daughter admitted that three or four of the girls on a 25 member cheer squad kiss sometimes and that the girls touched each other on the breast, but that is as far as they went. There was no sex. It was just girls exploring.

The mom told me she never did that as a child. She grew up in a strict family in Michigan and never dreamed of doing something like that because her family would kill her. She wanted to know if she had a problem or was this just girls exploring one another and that this will disappear? I admitted I had no answers.  I did not know if this was a problem or a phase.

The mom said it doesn’t bother her if Darla is bi-sexual, gay or straight. She was just shocked to see what she did.

I asked if it would bother if Darla kissed a boy. She said no. But it is the semi-nudity that worried her. She wants to end all sleepovers.

I bring this to the people. What do you think about this? I would love to hear from parents with teenage girls. Do you have advice for my friend? Is this normal behavior for young girls?  I quite frankly did not know what to tell her.  She reads comments here and on my face book and twitter pages.

Can you help or advise?


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One Response to “The kissing cheerleaders”

  1. Cindy Says:

    I am not a mother, & I am not a psychologist. I am a 24 year old, married, straight, woman, though. I do not think this type of behavior is odd. Maybe it is the times I grew up in. I went through a period of time, a few years ago, where I experimented with women. It was a phrase I went through. I do not think the mother should be worried if her daughter isn’t doing it. Perhaps a chat with the other girls parents, as a whole, to not single any few girls out, about sexuality with the team. I also think your friend should have a talk with her daughter, and if she truly cares about her not being gay//straight//bisexual, she should express that to her daught. and if she does care, it is important to express that as well. I grew up in a Catholic home, and left at age 17 for college…Fire Up, Chips!…I had lots of time with many different people, of all sorts of backgrounds and became what my mother would later call a “liberal, modern day hippie”. Strictly because our views differed. I was okay and comfortable with all kinds of people, she was not. It just wasn’t her thing. My mother and I were always close, despite our large differences, and when I began experiementing with women, knowing her view on the situation, made my approach to telling her I was dating a woman a lot different, and easier for me to tell her. I don’t know if this makes sense, but I hope it helps your friend. I hope I also didn’t offend her in any way. Like I said, I am not a parent, but I hope to be one day soon, as a newly married straight woman. The best advice I can give is to be open and honest with your children. Always. It will make it easier for your children to talk to you. I hope I have helped, and this makes sense! Good luck!


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